Friday, September 18, 2009

Get back in your Car! Please?

I was lazy today.  I was l a z y all week.  The sweet peeps in charge of my employment have been in court this week working their tails off and they let us take half days when these type of events occur.  See what I mean by sweet eh? 
I am not quite sure why I could have been in a rush to the office at 1:00 P.M., but maybe I was.  Don't judge me.  Some girls take much longer to get all gussied up (like me)because they have a particular way of doing things.  (Side Note: I have never been diagnosed with any obsessive compulsive disorder, which means I obviously don't have one, duh! Who needs a fancy person to tell me I am mostly normal besides when I pull out my eyelashes as a nervous habit.  Not I!)

Anywho, here I be, in traffic, with my best "the roads are my battlefield" face on.  I am going to be on time!  Wahoo!  AND THEN, the two cars in front of me begin madly cutting each other off.  Fingers are flying, the middle one for the most part. I can feel the angry vibes.  C'mon guys, lets just drive, we are in our cars, we must have places to be right?  Apparently not.  Red light.  A very angry He-She (still not sure of the gender) erupts like a volcano from it's vehicle.  Yelling, more fingers, and sososo much more yelling.  Green light.  Another red light.  My window rolls down, and a voice from my seat yells, "Get back in your car!!  Holy (Explative)!!  GET IN YOUR CAR!   Are you KIDDING ME!?" 


Dear Suzuki and Beemer,

This is your official "Paige Fabry Driving Citation."  Get your act together.  Your are NOT the only two drivers on this planet.  If there were a physical list of "Rules of Being a Considerate Driver," you just crapped on it. 

Location: Main Street (Freaking Main Street!) and 200 South.

Date: 9/18/09

Offense(s):
  • Getting out of your car on 200 South to berate Beemer.
  • Being unidentifiable as male or female.
  • Yelling.
  • Cursing in front of wee-ones.
  • Not getting back in your car when the light turned green.
  • Not getting back in your car when the light turned red again.
  • Making the rest of the people behind you late.
  • And, being an asshole.
Fine: Your face being associated with nastiness FOREVER by the people who witnessed your tantrum.  Nobody likes a nasty he-she.

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